The time: some decades hence.
The place: The University of South Jetsonville, a large state university.
The Grand Administrator is speaking to one of his minions about what used to be called the English Department. Although there are four faculty members who still comprise the "English Department," most of the department, and its chair, have been "restructured" and have disappeared in the name of increasing efficiency. Curiously enough, the number of administrators has only increased. We enter in the midst of the conversation.
The Grand Administrator: "What can you tell me about how we're achieving excellence in the English Department?"
Minion: "Well, our single section of English 101 is a success. The accrediting agency is happy that we have moved to weekly Scantron grammar quizzes instead of actual writing, since it's impossible to be accredited without measurable outcomes. There's nothing more measurable than a quiz."
From April 2008, so either prescient or just another case of the le plus ça change le plus c'est la même chose. That or, quoting Gen DeGaulle, ça c'est le chit en lit. Inspired by discussion of tenureless university, closer now than it was then. The scenario is equally reminiscent of a certain rural NM branch campus, cuyo nombre no quiero acordarme, circa 2003.... and no doubt innumerable others of its ilk